I saw that. Maybe we can arrange an M3 paint stripping.... er..... race.......Today a mid-13 isn't that quick. In 2000 it was OK.
The best value in a totally insane SUV is the Jeep Trackhawk. About $87k, it runs 11.7, but with a pulley swap and tuning, it runs into the 10's. Minor 4 hour change, for about $1500 max. Spend $3500 more? It will go 9.9x in the quarter.