General motors great adventure
Began with a Bush era tax quencher
The generals no fake
And it wanted the tax break
So the generals engineers
But down their beers
Worked four hard years
To get it into gear.
As the volt rolled out the chute
Peers cheered how it could scoot
How cute, What a hoot,
Perfect for the commute!
A techno marvel the tree huggers raved.
Think of the oil saved!
The oilmen felt an electric chill
So they hire the usual shills,
Spare no expense,
With orders to kill.
Radio land pitchmen
Made up some facts
oiled up congressmen
Attacked with fiery circus bats.
Time and again
They attacked with fury
Acting like judge and jury
They tried to bury
The volt in a hurry
Some Men of free will
Confused by the taxmans bill
Thinking it maybe a frill
Fell for the fire drill
As shills circled for the kill
President Obama stepped in
Giving the Volt a thumbs up grin.
The naysayers doubled down
Bringing in some right wing clowns
To bring the president down.
Drill baby drill
Shouted the crowd on the hill
And don't mind the spill
As they collected their bank bills
From the oil mans till
No need, I have the oil that you crave
A friendly sheik waved
By gods will and*some military drill
But the volt drivers stood firm
behind the generals berm
As the riot churned
From these true believers
A new rally cry went forth
The Volt is an over achiever
So for president it will run
The steely beast Can take it
No mortal man can break it
Into the future we will roll
Our economy finally Free
of an oil mans toll!
Forgive me Chevron for I have sinned
It has been three months since my last visit
But do not fret for I have a grin.
As I fill my tires with your Air
Its only fair, to explain
I am here with free rein
For I have used my brain
To break your oily chain.
Not only do I still travel
On roads both paved and gravel
In pursuit of the Suburban survival
But I now roam further still
Adding miles in joyous celebration
Of my gas station salvation
No longer must I wait
In long lines full of hate
For the juice from Kuwait
For now I plug straight in
To your oils next of kin.
It was an epiphany you see
The day I first drove my Volt with glee
The midnight ranters
with their Orwellian banter
Have it backwards you will agree
Only a new Volt can set you free!
Oh where, oh where
Have our Volt Hecklers gone?
Oh where, oh where can they be?
With their ears cut short
And their swagger cut long
Oh where, oh where can they be?
Have their Monster trucks run out of Gas?
Or have they decided to take a pass
On trying to explain away
Yet another Record Volt sales day?
I'm always up for a creative exercise! Since I bought my Volt just before Christmas, I wrote this in that vein and to mirror the feeling of driving with the feeling of opening a present here you go...
The silky draw of the ribbon as I pull out the bow
The gift sits still and heavy in my lap
Silence heralds my anticipation
The smooth front wheel power, as I lower the pedal to the floor
The car leaps forward gliding heavily upon the road.
A frozen lion caught leaping
Silky night silence at 65 with a light snow drifting
The best gifts I got this year was what I bought for myself
And the free electrons "borrowed" from my parent’s garage
Upon departing from Christmas
If science could be put into a box
And drawn tight with a bow
It'd give a Volt every during The Holidays
To all the good boys and girls
Who are well-qualified and of driving age
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