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Fresh off it's expose of the Chevy Volt, Reuters cub reporters Bernie Woodall and Ben Klaymanhas have applied their ugly math accounting method to the new Apple iPhone and declared it a dismal failure.
"Apple should just throw in the towel. After talking with industry analysts and guessing that Apple has invested $1 billion in R&D, manufacturing line buy outs, and inventory, we have determined that Apple is losing $1 billion per phone," said the Reuters Bernie Woodall. "It's actually worse, than that, as Apple has not sold a single iPhone 5," added Ben Klaymanhas. Drudge, Fox News, CNBC, USA Today are extensively re-quoting the Reuters ugly mathmen.
"We never really understood accounting in college. Still don't, too complicated. That's why we came up with our own ugly math way of figurin," said Woodall.
The Reuters scoop-makers announced that they will next look at how every McDonald's franchise is losing millions on their first Happy Meal sale. "We think business schools across the world should replace their long established business accounting methods with our "Reuters Ugly Math Accounting for Dummies by Dummies" methodology," opined Klaymanhas.
The Dean of Harvard Business School was speechless when asked to comment.
Saddly, the above comedy skit may be closer to the truth than we know given how they handled the Volt
"Apple should just throw in the towel. After talking with industry analysts and guessing that Apple has invested $1 billion in R&D, manufacturing line buy outs, and inventory, we have determined that Apple is losing $1 billion per phone," said the Reuters Bernie Woodall. "It's actually worse, than that, as Apple has not sold a single iPhone 5," added Ben Klaymanhas. Drudge, Fox News, CNBC, USA Today are extensively re-quoting the Reuters ugly mathmen.
"We never really understood accounting in college. Still don't, too complicated. That's why we came up with our own ugly math way of figurin," said Woodall.
The Reuters scoop-makers announced that they will next look at how every McDonald's franchise is losing millions on their first Happy Meal sale. "We think business schools across the world should replace their long established business accounting methods with our "Reuters Ugly Math Accounting for Dummies by Dummies" methodology," opined Klaymanhas.
The Dean of Harvard Business School was speechless when asked to comment.
Saddly, the above comedy skit may be closer to the truth than we know given how they handled the Volt
